It’s 2016 and mongering has not gotten easier, LE is constantly cracking down on parlors and faking out fellow Mongers looking to have a good time. In times like these, we have to be extra careful no matter how safe a location looks, and, as fellow HE loving human beings, we have to help each other out. Here’s a list I made out for my brethren:

In the case of going to a new parlor or any parlor, you should always:

• Have a pre-paid phone on you from Walmart or Target, easy to get, cheap and if you ever need to make an appointment, you have a disposable mobile device on hand at all times. It’s pretty hard for LE to track you down with a phone like that.

• Always, and I mean ALWAYS pay in cash. If there is ever a raid on a parlor that you’ve been to, then your name could come up if you have paid with your credit card. Better pay in cash, and never sign anything.
  

• Go around the establishment, check out the whole place. Make sure no mysterious looking  cars are parked close by. If it doesn’t feel right, just bail.

• Sometimes a little exercise can go a long way in keeping healthy and, more importantly, safe. Park your car a little farther than normal and walk to the parlor, just to make sure.

• Keep yourself concealed when entering the parlor. This may be for you Mongers out there that are especially worried about having your identity found out. Always remember to keep it short, as in, don’t walk into a parlor with a trench-coat and some black sunglasses Matrix style, instead opt for something that looks more normal, such as a baseball cap, some jeans and maybe some sunglasses. Lay low; I’ve known Mongers who have entire separate wardrobes and styles just for this. This also plays in part with walking, not driving directly to the parlor.